My Restorative Practice

by Bryna Parker

“I’m just here the for Savasana” ~T-shirts everywhere

Bryna Parker enjoying Legs up the (Headboard) Wall, a restorative pose you can easily do in bed.

Savasana — you know, that part of a yoga class where you get to find a supportive posture and relax?

I often hear, “This is my favorite part of yoga and it always seems to go by too fast. As soon as I am getting settled and begin to soften into stillness it is always time to come back.” 

We all need more time to settle and soften into our stillness, and that is what a Restorative Yoga Practice provides. Unlike more traditional yoga classes, a Restorative Practice is not about stretching; it is about opening into the stillness and like traditional yoga classes, it can take a little work, but the work happens within while the body is fully supported and still. 

Restorative yoga offers us more time to explore how we are feeling. While we are still we can ask ourselves:  

What is my mind distracted by? 

How do I feel today in my physical body? 

Where am I with my emotions right now? 

Am I fully breathing? 

What is this heaviness or tension in my body connected to energetically?

And through these questions we get to know ourselves more fully.

My Restorative Journey 

Becoming the silent observer of my inner landscapes took practice and time. Learning how to be present and breathe through all the sh*t that bubbles up when we turn inward can be a challenge at first, but this is where we become resilient. Just like Hatha Yoga, Restorative Yoga is a practice that you need to show up for over and over. It wasn’t easy for me to turn off the ruminating thoughts and worry or take a break from my need to accomplish and checking items off a list. I seem to always be creating a bunch of expectations for events that are in the future, or reliving past experiences and wondering how it could have been different. My mind was rarely in the present moment. I was often stuck in the past or asking eagerly what's next? Restorative yoga answered with “How about nothing?” 

With practice, I soon learned how to sit with myself and accept what is real in that moment without judgment. I could acknowledge and allow rather than ignore and avoid. Once I became comfortable observing and being without judgement, I could take the next step of moving closer to meditation. I began having conversations with my body explaining you are allowed to just be. I began thanking my body for all it does and then reassured myself that rest is a healthy healing practice — I don't always have to be preparing for what’s next. It’s ok to take time to just be present and find satisfaction in not doing. I begin to rewire my brain by training my body to unplug from all those sensory inputs so I could pay more attention to what my inner being needed. This practice of connecting to life force energy and listening to my own intuition was when it became so clear that most of the answers I had been searching for were already there inside of me; I was just too busy, distracted or fearful to seek my own inner wisdom. This restorative practice has empowered me to trust myself. Anytime I am unsure, I know I can pause and connect to that source of energy and wisdom that always resides inside of me. It’s there for you, too, I guarantee it. You just have to make your restorative practice a priority. 

Try this…

Your restorative practice could be as simple as taking your legs up the wall (or headboard) first thing in the morning while you are still in bed, breathing in and out intentionally, and observing what is present and honoring where you are today. 

In this way, you can start your day informed and prepared, knowing what you need so you can better support yourself (and others) throughout the day. 

What a beautiful gift to give yourself!

Join Bryna for Restorative practice on Tuesdays from 6pm-7pm. You can also find her teaching Chair Yoga on Mondays from 11am-12pm as well as occasional restorative popups and workshops on several topics including Yoga for Bigger Bodies, Chair Yoga, and Yoga for Tension Release using Yoga Tune Up balls. Check out our schedule.

Teacher Talk Tuesday: Meet Tiffany Prior

How did you begin practicing and teaching yoga? 

I began practicing about 16 years ago, when I pressed play on a yoga VHS in my bedroom. At the time, it felt so worldly and exotic, which really appealed to me being from a small town with few cultural outlets. My love for yoga expanded while I was in college in Chicago. I wanted to live at my local Bikram studio, sometimes doing 2 classes a day. I would scrounge up whatever extra money I had to go. When I wasn’t there, I would lay out one of my 3 well-worn copies of Yoga Journal on the floor and piece together a practice. It was shortly after that I discovered a video of Sri K. Pattabhi Jois instructing Ashtanga Primary Series, from 1993; my first foray into the world of Vinyasa. I desperately wanted to get my yoga certification then, and though it wasn’t able to come to fruition, my dream held on. I continued fervently practicing, learning as much as I could, until I moved to St. Louis in 2010. In 2011, after settling in and becoming more familiar with the yoga community, I found a training I was willing to try. I had my first teaching opportunity in October of 2012, at Joy of Yoga. At the time, it was a cute little startup in Midtown. I’m really grateful for that support and belief because it’s brought so many experiences and wonderful relationships.

How has yoga been transformational in your life?

Something I have learned about myself, through yoga, is that movement is essential to my mental and emotional well-being; never mind the physical benefits. I have to move my body every day. Even saying “move my body” seems reductive, it is too perfunctory a descriptor for the actual process taking place. It’s proprioceptive, psychosomatic healing. Where else in our lives are we able to freely express with every ounce of our being and know that what we are feeling is true? No one can negate the experience we have through movement, or the neurogenesis that takes place as a result. It truly is mind, body, and spirit. This practice has been a source of great strength for me. Yoga allowed me to feel strong and graceful simultaneously, to feel like I owned my body, and that I could do just about anything I set my mind to. Through yoga, I believed that I could birth my 2 sons at home, and I did. It allowed me to have the most powerful and transformational experiences I could have ever hoped to have. Everything else in life is relative to that now. Yoga allowed me to recognize the amount of power I have, especially as a woman.

What’s your favorite part about teaching yoga?

My first instinct is to say the creative and emotive aspect is my favorite, which it is. Guiding a room of people through this beautiful process of feeling and experiencing something both individually and together, in entirely unique ways, is incredible. But if I’m honest, I’ve recently had to start believing that people believe in me, and not just the students. I mean, wholly crap… an entire room of people just showed up to my class, and it wasn’t by accident? I don’t know why it’s taken me 8 years to get to this place, but I suppose it’s good that I’ll never take that for granted. So, I’m trying to be more open to the love of it all, and not feeling like a giant imposter. I will forever be a student.

What do you do to prepare for class?

I will usually do a little movement myself, to feel what is happening that day. I think about the people who I know will be there, and how I can best serve them. The students inspire me to be more creative and think outside the box; I never want to let them down. I seldom pre-write a flow and bring it to class. It makes me incredibly nervous and completely stifles my presence. If something isn’t landing, I want to be observing everything that is happening by being in it with them.

Do you have a favorite pose or movement?

Before kids, my answer would have been totally different. Pinchamayarasana (Forearm Balance). But these days, I live for Uttanasana (Standing Forward Fold). Parsvottanasana (Pyramid Pose is another go to in my morning movement. My physical practice is simple in this phase of my life.

If you were a yoga pose what would you be and why?

 Funky pyramid or flamingo pose. It’s approachable, yet challenging. Requires focus, but doesn’t take itself too seriously. It has second chakra connection, creativity, and is introverted but expressive.

What’s your favorite type of music to play while practicing? Do you have a playlist you’d like to share?

I am all over the place musically. It completely depends on my mood and the class. In my personal practice I like Bhakti, DJ Drez, Janis Joplin, 60’s kind of stuff, Erykah Badu, and reggae. In class, I can sometimes play the same, but I really like to keep it moody, artsy, and independent. Valerie June is my current love. She is absolutely from another planet and I can’t get enough.

Does your personal practice differ from how you teach?

At the moment, completely. I’m still trying to bring-it-for-the-people in the studio, but at home my practice is 100% in mindfulness with my children and husband. I want to peacefully parent with every ounce of my being and I’m moving my body purely for necessity. I am walking myself through meditation everyday, all-day, focusing on non-reactivity, positive thinking, healing and continuously evolving. Teaching is such a creative and sensitive endeavor for me, always striving to intuit what the students want and need. Teaching gives me the opportunity to get my fiery side out, a retreat from my mommy-space. It has been a wild ride from where I started 8 years ago, through 2 pregnancies, postpartum, and now. I’m grateful for the people who have stuck with me through it all!

Recommended reading (yoga and/or non-yoga)

Non-Violent Communication, by Marshall Rosenberg.

Peaceful Parent, Happy Kids, by Dr. Laura Markham. (Get the workbook because we have all been children, have been parented or are parenting, and almost certainly have healing to do.)

How would you describe yourself? What do you want people to know about you?

My students have described me as “a fierce and commanding teacher,” which I suppose shows up in other areas of my life as a projection of confidence. In all actuality, I’m an incredibly sensitive, highly emotional, and deeply feeling person. If you’re familiar with Myers-Briggs, I’m an INFJ - The Advocate, and in the Enneagram I’m a 4w5. Supposedly, I’m this rare type of person, which would make sense considering how awkward I usually feel. People assume I’m extroverted, especially when I’m approached after class, but once I’ve given my offering, I’m ready to rein it back in. I’m enthusiastic about what I’m interested in, want to learn about, or feel comfortable sharing.

Outside of yoga what is your passion/Where can you be found?

Moving my body, I only sit if I have to. I’ll be lifting in the gym, hiking, running, swimming, walking, or just generally busting it. After I had my second son, I felt the weakest I have ever felt; entirely broken. I never want to feel that way again. Aside from that, I spend nearly all of my time with my 2 boys and husband. If we’re lucky enough to be on the occasional date night, we’ll be seeing a show or listening to music and having great food.

Tell us a fun fact about yourself!

I love to travel. Particularly, with my husband, van travel. Prior to having children, we drove all over the country in our giant white passenger van. It had a bed platform in the back, kayaks, bikes, yoga mats, our dog, and whatever else we would need. We would camp anywhere and everywhere, bathe in mountain streams, hike, and be free to explore. It’s the best. It’s allowed me to practice yoga all over the country, go to Wanderlust 2 times, and experience the simple essence of life through being very minimal. It’s a core value of ours that we hope to pass along to our kids.

Anything else?

I teach at Blue Sky because Annie and the students have been so good to me. You all are family and I am grateful to have St. Louis to teach and practice yoga in. We have an amazing community here.

What I Learned at Summer Camp (aka Creating Everyday Bliss Retreat)

by Erin Vehige

I have a tendency to spread myself thin. I have multiple jobs that take me all over the St. Louis Metro area. Sometimes putting on 100+ miles in one day. And if I tally up all of the time I spend driving, preparing, researching, showing up, teaching, answering questions, meetings, writing, editing, etc. I’m sure I’m putting in close to 70 hours a week. I know many people who do more and many people who do less, and yet, they still feel the pull of work over the amount of leisure time given to themselves. Because work doesn’t stop with the work you get paid to do. There is still cooking, cleaning, laundry, putting laundry away, yard work, family obligations...you know what I mean. 

All this to say that I knew I needed a break, but I didn’t really know what that break would look like. Despite being a yoga student for many years and a teacher for 5, I had never been on a yoga retreat before, but I felt like that was what I needed. I’d admired from afar people talking about retreats and restoring themselves and feeling refreshed and like a new person, but it always seemed a little too far out of my reach. I would say things like “I don’t have the money.” “I can’t take that much time off work.” “I need to fix my car instead.” Other expenses and time commitments would get in the way. But this year was different for me. I realized I couldn’t afford NOT to do something just for me anymore. So I did a crazy thing...I turned 40.

Yeah, so that’s not so crazy, but I decided to do it in a big way. I said yes to not only one, but TWO yoga retreats with a European vacation nestled in between. The day after I returned home, my big birthday hit and I celebrated the beginning of a new decade by sleeping most of the day. It was a beautiful thing I never allow myself to do...until I went to adult summer camp (aka a yoga retreat called Creating Everyday Bliss with the godmother of yoga, Judith Lasater and her amazing daughter Lizzie). And bliss I did find, but how do you bring that back home? 

(All statements found in quotations below that appear without direct/immediate attribution come from Judith Lasater. Some are direct quotes; others are quoted how I remember and may not be exact).

9 Things I Learned at Summer Camp

1. “You should only be fasting when it’s your night to cook.”

   The evening before the sweat lodge day, Eric, a sweet and generous staff member at Feathered Pipe Ranch where the retreat was located, mentioned that it was a good practice to fast the day of the sweat. I had had a light breakfast and was planning on following the recommendation of fasting during lunch but as I emerged from the yoga room into the dining hall, I was brought face-to-face with the best comfort food ever: Grilled Cheese & Tomato Soup. It felt like I was being tested. Could I resist? What would happen if I ate? Would it be okay? I decided it was a sign from the Divine that I HAD TO have it. So I did. The seat next to Judith was open; I sat down, and eventually told the table the story above. Judith turned to me and first said something like, “One doesn’t fast when their at the Ranch.” (Seriously the food is TOO good). Then she said the above, “And really, you should only fast when it’s your night to cook.” Eat the meals made with love. Enjoy and savor food created from the heart. And use fasting as a way to get out of cooking! Ha!

2. “Yoga will ruin your life”…(in the best way possible)

   “Yoga changes the life you’re having so you can open to the life that is yours. Yoga is not really about love and light; it’s more about darkness & fear. You have to meet your own fears before you can release them…It’s like peeling an onion.” ~Judith Lasater

3. Tada Drashtuh Svarupe Vasthanam 

   Pantanjali Yoga Sutra 1.3 translates from Sankrit to “Then the seer abides in its own true nature.” This sutra was our mantra for the week of Restorative Camp with Judith. We chanted it before every class to center ourselves in the practice each morning and afternoon. At first the sutras can seem out of reach, but with a little attention, they begin to come alive. It is probably worth noting the sutras that come just before this third one. 

   Sutra 1.1: atha yoga anushasam “Now the discipline of yoga (is being presented),” and Sutra 1.2: yoga citta vritti nirodhah “Yoga is the resolution of the agitations of the mind.”  So in simple terms, once we come into yoga, we begin to reveal who we already have been. Yoga is not about changing you; it is about taking away the labels, the masks, the have-tos, should-dos, and need-to-dos in order to reveal the masterpiece that is our True Self, True Nature. Like the sculptor Michalangelo only revealed what was already in the stone. Two of his most famous quotes speak directly to this: 

   “Every block of stone has a statue inside it and it is the task of the sculptor to discover it.” 

   “I saw the angel in the marble and carved until I set him free.”

   So, too, are we masterpieces that can be revealed when we let the outside layers be chiseled away with the practice of yoga, and more importantly, the practice of rest. Yes, rest is a practice.

4. “Alignment before Range.”

   While we heard this phrase again and again over the week in regards to our physical bodies, some of us also came to the conclusion that “alignment before range” can really be applied to many things. 

   In the Body:

   Another one of Judith’s many sayings is “Your body is smarter than you are” so allow it to do its thing. 

   ~It is okay to have your legs wider apart when doing backbends because the shape of our sacrum may be wider than others. 

   ~Let your shoulders come up by yours ears. How else are you going to get the secret stash of Oreos in the back of the top cabinet?

   ~Let your back hip come with you in Triangle Pose. Also keep your front leg straight and don’t collapse in the side waist or drop the top shoulder to reach the floor. 

   Off the Mat — The Duck Index:

   ~Remember as a kid, or maybe you’ve seen kids, throwing bread to ducks? There usually is no greater joy for kids than this. So Judith came up with the Duck Index. This is a scale between a joyous yes (10) and a “someone is going to pay for this” yes (1). You know those yesses, don’t you? The ones where you really want to say no, but you’re afraid that you’ll upset the other person, but then you say yes and because you’re having a miserable time so is the person you said yes to because you’re making them pay for you to have said yes. Yes? So try to invoke the Duck Index when making decisions and if it isn’t over a 6 or 7, say no.

   ~Ask yourself “does what I’m about to do include taking care of myself; is saying yes to someone else saying no to me?”

   ~No is a complete sentence. 

   Essentially, the Duck Index is about Alignment before Range. Are you in alignment with your True Self? Are you being truthful about your body, mind and spirit’s needs? If you are not, then you are not doing yourself any good even if you are “doing something.” Make sure that everything you are doing aligns with your purpose before stretching yourself to make it happen. There will be days that you don’t want to go to work and doing the thing is a 2 on the Duck Index; we all have them, right? But then when we start to put together the why then we start to see how doing the thing brings us into alignment and then we are able to reach a little more and find the range and it brings it a little higher on on Duck Index. What value does the thing bring?

5. “The Airport Is an Ashram.”

   “The workshop begins as soon as you arrive at the airport; notice the tendency to judge, cling and wanting it to be different; you can bring to that environment a sense of ease...this can change the world.” ~Judith Lasater

   The theme for this year’s Restorative Summer Camp was Spaciousness, and how can we create that spaciousness in our everyday lives. It is easy to find the space when you are on retreat, have very little access to Internet or phone service, the closest town/city is 30 minutes away, and there is a team of people cooking with great love for three delicious meals a day, including desserts. You literally have no obligations except to just be. But how can you take the spaciousness from retreat and bring it back into your daily life off of the mat?

6. Unplug Daily: "Almost everything will work again if you unplug it for a few minutes, including you." ~Anne Lamott

   One of our lifetime homework assignments was to give ourselves a 20 minute restorative pose EVERY DAY. This can sound very difficult, but when you really assess how you spend your day, I’m sure you can find 20 minutes to retreat. 20 minutes to unplug. To restart. And when you do, you will find that you run more efficiently, more effectively with more energy and more focus. How do I know this? I’ve been home now for 16 days as of this writing. Of those 16 days, I have made time for this practice 14 times. My life has shifted (and will continue to shift) dramatically since I’ve been home. Maybe it is because I went on retreat in the first place. Maybe it’s because I stepped away for 3 weeks, but maybe it’s because I learned how to step away for only 20 minutes most days that I see the space that I can create for myself to be more productive. I actually use my planner now. I schedule my rest. And when I rest, my creative ideas flow. Some days more than others, but every day, I GIVE myself the time. 

7. Yutori

   Yutori is a Japanese term or concept meaning spaciousness, but the kind of spaciousness that you plan so that you have space around time for pleasure and joy. In an interview on Krista Tippett’s On Being, poet Naomi Shihab Nye mentioned Yutori and used a student quote to explain: “it’s leaving early enough to get somewhere so that you know you’re going to arrive early, so when you get there, you have time to look around.” We learned to stop using time as an excuse. It is not that we don’t have enough time to get something done or to do something that we would like to do; it is more like we did not give ourselves enough space in time to complete that task or to do that thing.

8. “No Rushing. No Waiting.”

   Yutori reminds me of another lifetime homework assignment: No Rushing. No Waiting. These are two concepts I have to repeat to myself many times throughout the day. When I find myself hurrying to the next thing and getting frustrated that I’ve not allowed myself enough time, I remember this and then say to myself “Time is Big.” This is a quote I learned from Julia Cameron’s The Artist’s Way, but it applies here as well. I may be in a hurry, but I don’t have to let the hurry rush me to the next thing. I can still be present in the now. The same thing is true for the opposite statement: No Waiting. At times, I may find myself in heavy traffic or a long line. I can be frustrated and bothered and upset and maybe even getting angry, or I can choose to be in the moment — the RIGHT NOW — look around, watch, notice, see, observe and discover the life happening. Maybe a beautiful sunset is on the horizon; maybe a child is laughing in the line ahead. Recognize the space given to you in that moment and allow that moment to fill you with awareness and presence. 

   ~Ask yourself: “What is my current relationship with rest?”

9. Water Is Life Giving.

   “In one drop of water are found all the secrets of all the oceans.” — Kahlil Gibran

   By the water, you can make lifelong friends in less than an hour. Whether you are sitting in silence watching the sun go beyond the pine trees or you’re admiring an osprey hunting for food in the stillness of the lake, the water is there to replenish you after a day in the mountains. There is a reason that a babbling brook is a sound recorded and used in sleep machines because a real life brook feeding the lake was my nightly meditation. Small sprays of water on fire-heated rocks can create enough steam to fill a sweat lodge, and sweat can pour from your body releasing thoughts of doubt, self-consciousness, sadness, elation, confusion and lost direction. The ripples of the lake are metaphors for the ripples of life that all our decisions have and the ripples of friendships formed around the water. Water will remind me of my invisible sangha for the rest of my life. The sangha I share with everyone on this earth and beyond it.